Let me be brutally honest, I feel a bit sad, melancholy if you will when I think of my forever home. I get down because there is nowhere on this earth that makes me say to myself, “this is it! This is where I want to spend the rest of my life.” But let me begin this blog by telling you, whatever decision you make when choosing where to live after you transition out of the military, you don’t have to stay there forever. You can test-drive the best location for you at the time and if you don’t like it, don’t be afraid to try somewhere new.

My father was in the Army growing up. My parents divorced when I was young and my mother moved me from the only place I did call home as a child, during my Junior year of high school, ugh. And to be honest, I can only name one person from that high school, the high school I ended up graduating from…and that is only because he and I dated.

Neither of my parents lives in the places they did when I was young, in fact, they both have moved a few times since I joined the Air Force 23 years ago. I tell you all that to say, I don’t have a forever home. Worst yet, I haven’t a clue as to where I want to settle down after retirement.

The term “Forever Home” is both a literal and figurative phrase. It can be the actual home that you buy and live in forever. It can also be the location you choose to live in forever, but not necessarily the brick and mortar home you live in. You can say you want to settle down in Chicago were you born and raised, but you may live in 3 different homes while you are there before you decide on the perfect location.

A forever home, or even a for “right now” home needs to fit within the criteria you have established for yourself (and your family if you have one.) The below tips will help you narrow down the criteria for your search and point you in the right direction of the city of your dreams.

A. You can decide to stay where or near your location at the time of your transition. You likely have a network of friends there and maybe you were even lucky enough to secure a civilian position in the vicinity before you got out. You’ll be close to a base and depending on your separation/retirement status you may be able to use base resources, i.e. commissary, BX/PX, or medical clinic. If you don’t have access to base privileges because you separated without disability benefits, it is likely that there will be a decent VA clinic/hospital near that you can use for free or near-free medical care.

B. You can go back to the place you call “home” and rebuild your network there. If you still have family and close friends there, it may be easy to pick up where you left off. This option reiterates the importance of staying in touch with those that matter to you most. The military is different from most experiences you have had previously, making it easy to disconnect from the old and now unfamiliar. But, resist the urge to disconnect. Hopefully, you can also stay with friends or family for a few months, giving yourself the opportunity to stack even more cash and find the right home to settle in.

C. You can pick a brand new place. This can be a place you were stationed at previously, a place you heard was nice, a place where you have friends or family, or even a place you know nothing about. It is never too late or too early to start fresh.

1. Establish Your Forever Home Criteria

To begin your forever home search, you have to ask yourself, “What are you looking for?” What matters to you? Does size matter? Location? Proximity to something important to you? Diversity? Make a list of what is important to you. (Mine is below)

• In or within 20 miles of a Medium-Large sized city (1)
• Diverse in ethnicity and age groups (4)
• Business opportunity (3)
• Has a major Airport (8)
• Affordable for my expected income (2)
• Welcoming community (7)
• A moderate climate that can skip winter all together (5)
• Access to a major water source (I need to be able to fish) (11)
• Military Base within 150 miles (12)
• High ranking school systems (public or private) (6)
• Home to multiple Universities (10)
• Home to major/minor sports Team (9)

Once your list is complete, rank your list in 1 – n order or what’s important to you, starting with your non-negotiables at the top. I ranked my list above with the 1-n ranking in parenthesis after the line number. As I quickly ranked my list, I changed the numbers quite a few times. Although I was able to complete the ranking task in about 10 minutes, I discovered that the majority of the list was important to me. So when looking for my forever home, I have a lot to consider.

Once that is complete you need to figure out the second part of the narrowing process. The criteria that is practical for you, your budget, and your family.

2. Location, Location, Value

You want to choose your home in an area that is a desirable location with a long history of maintained or steadily growing value. What if you choose what you believe to be the perfect area, then you get offered your dream job 2 years later in another city…in another state. If you leave that home you bought, will you be able to sell it for at least what you paid, will you be able to rent it out, can you afford to let it sit empty, or is it s fixer-upper (that you never got around to fixing up), in an area with a no-so-great school district, with no industry to sustain that community?

Ask yourself:

• Is the population of that area growing, stagnant, or decreasing?
• Is there an opportunity for employment and income growth?
• How are the school and school systems?
• What is the crime level?
• Do people in that area care about and take care of their homes and lawns?
• What is the current real estate cycle you are in? Are you in the middle of a housing bubble or are you getting in right after a sharp decline in real estate prices?

It is my opinion that you should always buy a home that you can easily sell. Now, if you have no intention of buying and you want to help pay someone else’s to mortgage off by renting, then you need to consider the rental lease. You are no longer covered by the Servicemembers Civil Relief Act (SCRA). You can’t get out of your lease with only 30 days’ notice. And if you are like me, and really sat down and read your lease, it is very expensive to get out of an apartment or home rental lease. Sometimes you can get away with paying the rent until the homeowner/apartment manager can rent the unit. Other times you have to pay a 3-6 month lease-breaking fee.

Moving is expensive, but the right opportunity is definitely worth the expense. Choose the right location for the right price and you won’t have any regrets.

3. Budget

How much house can you afford? That is a popular phrase I’ve heard a time or two, but what that phrase doesn’t cover is the cost of ownership (or renter-ship is some of your cases). First, you need to determine the raw number in your budget that you can afford toward a home payment every month. The raw number needs to be large enough to include:

Buying

• Mortgage ( and HOA)
• Utilities
• Maintenance (Upkeep, improvements, lawncare)
• Taxes
• Insurance

If buying you also have to consider the one-time expenses of closing costs, escrow, down payment, and initial supplies. Remember that nice chunk of dislocation allowance (DLA) you get with every move is over. A lot of the one-time expenses I just covered in the previous sentence should be negligible if you use your VA loan (which I highly encourage you to do).

Renting

• Initial Down Payment (a flat-fee or first/last month’s rent)
• Possible deposits for utilities
• Utilities
• Renter’s Insurance
• 10% annual hikes in rent

4. Understand Your Financial Picture

I am a financial manager and I have a Master’s Degree in International Financial Management and I am a Finance Officer in the Air Force. I would be remiss if I didn’t remind you lovely people reading this of the financial implications of moving. Your personal financial picture has a lot to do with your credit score. Knowing and understanding your credit score is imperative. I can’t gloss over it and you can’t ignore it. You need to know what your credit score is, why it is the number is it, and if it isn’t ideal what you need to do to fix it…before you get out of the military.

For most military members, I can broadly say that even if you have a less than desirable credit score, you can significantly improve it by making scheduled payments on-time every month, reducing your credit-to-debt ratio, paying off the smallest balances first/or paying the highest interest debt first/or a combination of the two methods, and last but not least, scrubbing your credit report for inaccurate information.

You also need to make sure that if you have ANY debt before you enlisted or commissioned into the service, you have contacted that creditor and asked them to apply the SCRA. They can go back 20-years if necessary to make corrections to your account and refund the interest overpayments to your or towards your credit balance.

Now let’s lighten-up the list and talk about the forever home criteria that doesn’t revolve around money.

5. Your Family

The next criteria for your forever home search need to be your family. And more importantly your children. The reason I say, kids, over the adults is, as an adult you can get to where you need to in order to feel good. You can drive to the nearest running trail, go to your favorite mall, eat at your favorite restaurant, or hang out at your favorite bar. Our children are completely reliant on what is in walking or biking distance or what is right in their own home or neighborhood for entertainment. Factoring in the needs of your children when choosing a forever home will save you (the parent) a lot of heartache and headache in the long run. Ask yourself a few questions.

1. Are their other kids in the neighborhood and are those children my kids’ ages?
2. Does my child have access to developed green space? i.e. A skatepark, well-developed park with activities.
3. Is there access to a community center or clubhouse?
4. How are the school districts? Do they bus or do I have to drive them in and pick them up?
5. Do I have access to plentiful and reliable child care options?
6. Can my child participate in after school sports and activities without me becoming their chauffeur?

You also have to consider your partner. Does he or she have access to things that make them happy and provide for them self-care? Are there people that look like them in your neighborhood? Does that even matter to them? If you or they are a stay-at-home parent, are there others like you in close proximity?

These are not all the questions you should be asking yourself, but it is definitely a start that will lead you to other questions.